Kids have terrible judgement. My 4yo comes into our room every morning at 5am, wakes his mummy up, tells her that he loves her, and then HE goes back to sleep. What a cvnt. The only time you want to hear “I love you” at 5am is on the way home from the pub.
This is not the only thing he does, sometimes he does something hilarious but it’s the wrong time or wrong place. The other day I turned around and he was naked from the waist down with his underparts hooked over his genitals, swinging it side to side shouting, “I’m a clock!”
“Mate, it’s funny, but we’re in a Coles. At least get away from the meat fridges”
It’s my fault. I’m the one who’s ruined him. Comedian’s shouldn’t be parents because we have ulterior motives. My youngest son goes to kindergarten Tuesday and Thursdays, and when I pick him up I’ve taught him to say, “C U Next Tuesday”. Because it’s funny when a child says naughty words.
But because he’s too young to know what he’s saying, he just thinks it’s a way to say goodbye that makes adults happy.
This isn’t a one off. I taught my eldest son to do it too.
I want to say thank you to their mother, my wife. She is the reason the crazy dream started and she fills my life with love and meaning. I can never thank her enough for our children. They mean the world to me.
Gig Report
I had a hoot of a time at Hindley Street Comedy on the 29th of April. Being so close to ANZAC Day and the room runner, Stephen Lockwood, is a veteren so it felt appropriate to bust out an old joke about an interaction I had with a military person in my building. I hadn’t said it in a while, but it was a nice touch of nostalgia for me.
The room itself is early in it’s infancy, and Stephen is working hard to get it where it deserves to be. It’s had good numbers already and once the teething issues are sorted it’s going to be a great spot in adelaide’s scene.
Up Coming Gigs
There’s not much on the radar in the near future, but I have some new jokes that I will be working in so keep an ear on the open mics. My Favourite open mic of course is Laugh Lab.
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