Are fur-baby parents parents?

Parents hate it when people call their pets ‘fur-babies’. Parents hate it because they don’t think they’re comparable. I disagree, I think there’s no difference, pets and babies are so similar that it’s not uncommon for a couple to get a dog to practice first. Selling second hand furniture for either of them is the same

For sale: baby furniture; slightly chewed

It’s unwarranted to cop flak for calling your pet a fur-baby. If anything, it takes as much sacrifice and dedication because you are voluntarily choosing to look after something you aren’t biologically or genetically obligated to. And most importantly I don’t want to alienate cashed up pet owners who don’t have to fork out to send their dogs to fancy schools.

No matter how hard you try pets don’t stay ‘fur-babies’ forever; if you have a fur-baby and then have a baby-baby pretty soon you’ll have a baby-baby and a pet. You could make them fight over your love but there can only be one winner and you can’t leave your baby-baby outside overnight and expect to keep it in the morning. Babies are forever and not just for Christmas.

It’s harder being a baby-baby parent than a fur-baby parent. For example, you can train dogs to follow commands, but you have to keep them on a leash. Conversely, toddlers never listen but put them on a leash and you’re a monster. You can teach a dog to sit, to heel, to come, but you can’t stop a toddler touching someone’s eyes. If you want to come around and meet my newborn son, I will need to see your vaccination status for COVID, whooping cough, and a pair of safety glasses.

Toddlers are infinitely more dangerous than dogs – purely from all of the germs they carry from daycare. Sure, a dog can bite and maul, but a baby can cough once and level a family. You can eat all the bats in a wet market but give babies in daycare enough time and they will bring home leprosy.

Pets and babies are the same. So, if you want to call your dog or cat a fur baby, or a hairy baby a fur baby, then go your hardest. If you’re not convinced about babies being the same as fur babies then consider this: everyone in public will come up and give you unsolicited advice on how to raise/train/care for your charge whether you like it or not, and they will never think you’re doing a good enough job. No. Matter. What. If only I could get my either of my kids to clean themselves and shit in a box.